As parents and educators, we love seeing children succeed. Whether it’s mastering a new math concept, reading a challenging book, or completing an assignment independently, those moments of success are exciting to celebrate.
But what happens when learning doesn’t come easily?
When children become frustrated, make mistakes, or struggle to understand something, our natural instinct is often to step in and help. While providing support is important, some of the most valuable learning experiences happen when children are given the opportunity to work through challenges.
At St. Bernard, we want our students to understand that learning isn’t always easy, and that’s okay. Developing the confidence to face challenges, try different strategies, and persevere through difficulties is an important part of becoming a successful learner.
What Is Productive Struggle?
Productive struggle happens when students encounter something challenging but manageable and work through it with appropriate guidance and support.
It might look like a student trying several strategies to solve a math problem, rereading a passage to better understand it, or working through an unfamiliar assignment before asking for help.
The key word is productive.
The goal isn’t to leave children feeling overwhelmed or frustrated without support. Instead, it’s to provide challenges that encourage thinking, problem-solving, and persistence while making sure students have the tools and guidance they need to succeed.
Learning often happens when students move beyond what they can already do independently and begin developing new skills.
Mistakes Are Part of the Learning Process
Children sometimes believe that making a mistake means they aren’t good at something. They may become discouraged when they don’t understand a concept immediately or when their first attempt doesn’t work.
One of the most important lessons we can teach children is that mistakes are a normal part of learning.
When a student gets an answer wrong, it provides an opportunity to understand what happened, consider a different approach, and try again.
Rather than focusing only on whether an answer is correct, we can encourage children to think about the process they used to get there.
Questions such as “What have you tried so far?” or “Can you think of another way to approach this?” help students recognize that learning involves thinking, adjusting, and growing.
Knowing When to Help and When to Step Back
Finding the right balance between supporting children and allowing them to work independently can be challenging.
If we immediately provide the answer whenever something becomes difficult, children may miss opportunities to develop problem-solving skills and confidence.
However, allowing a child to remain stuck or overwhelmed isn’t productive either.
Sometimes the most helpful thing we can do is offer a small amount of guidance rather than solving the entire problem.
For example, instead of telling your child exactly how to complete an assignment, you might ask:
What part do you understand so far?
What is the first step you could try?
Have you done something similar before?
Is there a resource or example that might help you?
What could you ask your teacher if you’re still unsure?
These questions encourage children to take an active role in their learning while reminding them that support is available when they need it.
Building Confidence Through Challenges
Confidence doesn’t develop only when things go well. It also grows when children experience challenges and discover that they are capable of working through them.
Think about the pride a child feels after finally solving a difficult problem, learning a new skill, or completing something that initially seemed impossible.
Those experiences help children develop a sense of confidence in their ability to learn and improve.
Over time, students can begin shifting their thinking from “I can’t do this” to “I can’t do this yet.”
That small change in perspective can make a meaningful difference in how children approach future challenges.
How Families Can Encourage Productive Struggle
Families play an important role in helping children develop perseverance and a positive approach to learning.
One way to encourage this is by recognizing effort, strategies, and progress rather than focusing only on the final result.
Instead of saying, “You’re so smart!” consider saying, “I noticed you tried a different strategy when the first one didn’t work.”
You can also model perseverance by talking about challenges you experience in your own life. When children see adults make mistakes, ask questions, and keep trying, they learn that struggling with something doesn’t mean they are incapable.
Most importantly, pay attention to when a challenge is becoming overwhelming. If your child is becoming increasingly frustrated, anxious, or discouraged, it may be time to take a break, offer additional guidance, or communicate with their teacher.
The goal is not to make learning harder. It is to help children develop the skills and confidence to work through challenges with appropriate support.
Growing Through the Difficult Moments
As educators and families, we share the goal of helping children become capable, confident, and independent learners.
That means celebrating their successes, but also recognizing the value of the challenges they encounter along the way.
At St. Bernard, we want students to know that they don’t have to understand everything immediately, get every answer correct, or complete every task perfectly.
What matters is that they continue learning, ask for help when needed, and develop the perseverance to keep moving forward.
Because sometimes the most important learning happens not when something comes easily, but when a child discovers that they can do something difficult.
St. Bernard Catholic School is part of the Green Bay Area Catholic Education (GRACE) School System. It is a private Catholic school that serves preschool and elementary through 8th grade (PK3-8) with open enrollment. St. Bernard’s provides an individualized education in a faith-based environment. Each child is supported not only academically, but spiritually.
